Hi Friends (Exactly what the title states right?),
I’ve been busy networking, adjusting to my job, going through healthy rounds of therapy, and crying because of rejection. You would think that after my reading for Outloud SB I would be thriving in confidence, and I was for a bit, but it’s starting to fade a little. I’ve always had trouble taking rejection because I ALWAYS felt like I’ve had to prove myself to others. I know people say not to care and to be yourself; however, sometimes it’s easier said than done. The best part is I’m trying! I’m trying to be positive, trying not to let doubts get to me, or comparing my lack of success with other people I could care less about.
Anyway, I wanted this blog to highlight the struggles of becoming a writer because I know writers struggle in silence. The following are two emails I received from two journalism positions that rejected me.
You know what doesn’t make sense? When companies are looking for a candidate that needs at least two years of experience, but you can’t get an internship that would assist in that experience unless you actually know an insider.
Okay forget that entire rant!
On another wonderful note, since I work at my old community college as a writing tutor, I’ve been able to renew relationships with my former English professors and bosses. I’ve told them my aspirations of becoming an English professor, as well as a journalist and they gave me a whole list of ideas on how to achieve those goals.
I had emailed my former English professor earlier this year about how I was struggling to find a job, so she and I have been emailing back and forth for a while. She invited to my old program farewell party, where I was able to reconnect with my professors/bosses and made me give a speech to show students that I am a success story.
Thinking about it now, maybe I’m blinded by these obstacles that I have yet to enjoy my own success. You should’ve of seen it! Everyone was beaming that I came back with an M.F.A. My professors were incredibly proud and even those strangers that were listening to my speech about how this particular program I was in helped me get to where I am today. Me, a tiny brown woman, has excelled this far in education, despite her circumstances. WOW!
Maybe I needed to blog a little to talk myself out of my doubts? Anyway, I have a billion of emails to send out and a bio to write… let’s just say I need to get my shit together!
P.S: Sorry for delaying on the Creative Content Sunday’s thing, I’ve been saving money to buy a new laptop so I can post more consistently. I’m actually using my sister’s laptop. I was so scared I broke it right now because her battery was dying and I was trying to charge it and it shut down by itself. I rather have my own laptop so nobody blames me for breaking their things. LOL.
P.S.S: The title is in reference to my 2013 post- https://theofficialkikireyes.com/2016/10/13/get-it-together-kiki/